She’s Not Having a Baby

lynn chen
7 min readAug 17, 2023

CW: Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Infertility. Please protect your heart if you do not want to read about this subject.

This essay was originally published at my Substack, GenXTaste.com. Please note: I do use affiliate links and may earn a commission when you purchase something.

Image from She’s Having a Baby, Dir. John Hughes. DP: Donald Peterman.

Jake: In the end, I realized that I took more than I gave, I was trusted more than I trusted, and I was loved more than I loved. And what I was looking for was not to be found but to be made.

She’s Having a Baby, 1988

I can’t believe I’m writing about this subject again.

I can’t believe this because for years I was super public about my infertility, to the point where it became part of my identity to embrace my child-free decision. I’d done an interview for the Huffington Post, a viral video for BuzzFeed, shared my full journey in podcasts and blog posts. I even wrote an entire TV pilot about it that I’ve been trying to sell!

I thought I was done talking about not being able to get pregnant.

And then, one Friday in February…

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